Whitest Girl You Know

Translucent ruminations of a very pale girl.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

I Sound Like A Seahorse

I woke up this morning and felt like a trainwreck. Normally, I get really bothered by Mike calling me a bum but I was officially sick with a hacking cough, pukey feelings and cold sweats so I didn't let his comments bother me today. My voice keeps going in and out and I really do sound like a magical sea creature.

On another note, I think seahorses are overlooked and extremely odd "things". I kinda want one now.

Mooninites Arrive En Mass, Bomb Scare Ensues

Thank god I didn't have to drive anywhere today because people in Massachusettes are fucking retards. Has anyone seen the mooninite LCD throw-ups? After meeting this designer Ryan from Arnold, I checked out his website to find out that there was one right down the street from me! I didn't post a link because it seems he took down all the pics, which were awesome.

Anyway, Interference, Inc. has been leaving them all over town (and many other cities) but the result has been blown out of porportion (no pun intended). Talk about getting amazing press off this shit. Granted, CNN and Adult Swim are both owned by Turner.

Just goes to show what a slow news day it is and how lame and uptight Boston can be. I mean really, would you think that a pixelated creature flipping the bird is a bomb? Especially since the first one went up in South Boston over 2 weeks ago?

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Say Word

Only if it were more true, my world would be a better place. And if in-text linkage action actually worked for me.

Monday, January 22, 2007

A Very Belated Birthday

I seem to be late for a lot of things. Unfortch, I've once again been all over the place to have a moment to type.

Last Friday, January 19th was the day greatness was born...twice. Once in 1978 and again in 1982. Let's start with age before beauty.

Josh Mann is the smartest guy that anyone knows. He speaks dead languages and teaches them to priveleged boarding school kids. He also loves Doctor Who and obscure indie rock. He's the guy on the left in the pic, with the beard, like all Andover guys have. For his birthday, we had Dark Wave Board Game Night at our place which included noise makers, party hats, Indian food, sparkler candles, The Cure, Wii and Call of Cthulu board games (very complicated). I stole Josh's pic from Friendster.

Michelle is the coolest girl I know. And has been for almost 7 years. Pictured here with her longtime boyfriend, Vito, Michelle is going to school to become a nutritionist, enjoys kickboxing and loves kitties. I went down to Brooklyn to hang out with her last Saturday to celebrate her bday and we watched mindnumbing TV, ate lots of yummy food, tried to drink and dance and slept very well. It was a brief trip - only 22 hours - but well worth it. She is one of the biggest reasons I miss NYC.

Happy Birthday!

Today Is the Unhappiest Day of the Year

Not necessarily for me...things have been fine today with the exception of some unfortunate news that my BFFs from HS, the sisters Roe, mother passes away on Thursday.

Alas, the third Monday of January is blessed with the title of the saddest day of the year due to S.A.D., distance between days off, something else and the fact that it's a Monday. There's a big ol' scientific formula behind it, well, just an equation which is as scientific as I can pay attention to. Needless to say I didn't catch all the details of this equation because I was at the gym.

However, if you are suffering from the saddest day of the year, here are some things CNN suggests you do: drink some wine, take a nap, get an ionizer, get a light box. I love how drinking wine is their first option.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

World Premiere Next Saturday 1/27!!!

Two years ago I "met" Sarah while doing wardrobe with her on a children's movie called The Naked Brothers Band. It's my only IMDB credit but how many people even have IMDB credits? Anyway, we dressed rich brats who weren't professional actors and a few standout professional child actors (I adopted a son, his name is Cooper and I was in love with Cole, who had my favorite line in Big Daddy). The movie was a super cheesy vanity project for an aging Emmy winner and her family.

Anyway, Sarah's fan club notified her that there's a poster on 38th and 10th in Manhattan advertising that the premiere of the movie will be on Nickelodoeon January 27th at 8pm (I think that's the time). We've never seen it. Funny thing is Sarah's media manager has, at the Hamptons Film Festival last year, which we weren't invited to.

So, if you want to play a drinking game, do a shot every time you see one of the main characters twitch OR whenever the kids break out into song.

This movie is goint to be a fucking masterpiece.

Things I Think About When I'm Drunk

- french fries
- chocolate milkshakes, er, frappes (in New Englandish)
- mac n cheese (real deal Kraft not any organci shit)
- french fries
- water, like diving in a pool and drinking to whole thing
- fried cheese (i.e. carozzas, mozzerella sticks, etc.)
- cola
- cereal
-french fries

Boston Blind Item

Which modelesque up-and-coming stylist was seen getting cozy on the dance floor with one of the town's best known DJ/producer types as I was dancing on top of a table? After a late night, including a pit stop at 2:30am at the InterContinental Hotel's awesome 24 hour bistro, the same "steam queen" trapped my cat in our fold out couch only to be rescued by a very hungover Mike. (SIDENOTE: This is not a vicious item, it's more poking fun at drunk friends who are embarrassed about the previous evening's events)

Had an INCREDIBLE evening of debauchery with some of the coolest people I know at Foundation Lounge. I love getting drunk and dancing to cheesy hip hop. And eating french fries late at night. However, I do not love having to get up to go to the gym while I'm feeling queasy. But I did it. Eating organic mac n cheese was NOT a good idea for breakfast.

It's currently 32 degrees.

Unsubstantiated Rumors

Lindsay Lohan is going to rehab.

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Manillo are engaged and might have an April wedding.

Hillary Duff takes clen. Rachel Zoe used to push it on clients.

Mandy Moore is dating DJ AM.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Lack of Visuals

The reason why I love sites like DListed and Gawker is that there is more likely than not a picture with every post. Reading is fundamental but I'd much rather look at pictures. Same goes with magazines (although I get New York Mag for the articles, not the photos).

On that note, I'm going to make more of an effort to post pics. Whether they are relevant to the post or not, I'm sure you really want to look at something more then letters. ::sigh:: Now I just need Mike to clean up the laptop I just inheritted from him so I can get down to business.

Giving In

I don't know why I've been so resistent to get a trainer all these years. Maybe if I did so back in college, I wouldn't need one now.

I really wanted to post his picture but I'm just too lazy at the moment. His name is Greg and he kicks both mine and Mike's ass on a regular basis. I see him twice a week and hopefully he can do something about my unfortunate booty. He loves making me do pushups. I can't do pushups by the way. Mike already yelled at him for letting me do pussy pushups on my knees.

My level of commitment is bare minimum at the moment. I know it's going to take a couple times before I'm psyched on it. And I know I'll end up getting psyched on it. I haven't sweat so much since I was trying to run a lot this time last year. As ridiculous as I must look out there on the basketball court with rubber bands around my legs and hopping up and down of the bleachers, I'm sure it'll pay off. I give it 6 weeks.

Wish me luck!

Drawing A Blank

Last night, Colin, Rachel and (cousin) Alex came over. We watched some movie by Mike Judge (of Beavis & Butthead and Office Space fame). It wasn't Office Space and I fell asleep somewhere in the middle. We also played Hearts and ate pizza. I had a thousand and one ideas for posts then. Now, maybe two. I have so much catching up to do.

Any ideas?

Monday, January 15, 2007


I haven't posted in 9 days. I have to post 10 times before I'm caught up. There was a death in the family and everyone had to go to NY (seperately, I went to NY for a meeting with a book agent for Sarah and Mike and Shaka went for Intermezzo...actually Mike just went shopping for 5 days).

OK, Mike's putting the dog on the counter and I'm being antisocial so I must go.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Resolutions From A Little Girl Lost

I had a very trying but rewarding evening last night. I've lost myself and it took unfortunate circumstances to realize this (or, well, to be told this). I understand what has happened and plan on taking que from Britney Spears and "get back to me". I came out knowing what needs to be done and feeling a large weight has been lifted. Things are going to be good in the 007.

So, here is a tentative list of things I'd like to accomplish:

1. Go to the gym regularly, get a trainer, feel better about myself.
2. Go back to pilates, eventually.
3. Start playing tennis, even if it's just once.
4. Take a class at the Fort Point Art Studio next door, start drawing & painting again.
5. Continue to post a minimum of once a day here.
6. Pimp mine and Sarah's book proposal, hopefully get a deal.
7. Minimize debt (tough one).
8. Take a sociology class, one day.
9. Stick up for myself more.
10. Take Hugo for longer walks by the Channel when it's warm.
11. Curb my complaining because it's impossible to just stop.
12. Begin testing for my creative direction portfolio.
13. Prove myself to Achilles and take initiative (wish me luck!).
14. Get health insurance so I can get my head shrunk and go back on my steroid inhaler.
15. Get to Europe, somehow.

That's it for now. I'm sure there's more to come.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Misery + Company = True Love

I've worked myself into a premenstural fit of anxiety that is the equivalent of walking on a highwire over a valley of self doubt. The subsequent effect could possibly be implosion or a panic attack.

Come on... you love the metaphor! And you love the melodramatics. It's not that serious, I've justing been thinking too much about OPP (in this case, the last P is for "problems").

There have been things, issues, topics and controversies eating away at me slowly for some time now. Although I've been maintaining a happy-go-lucky attitude the past few days while I've been alone (Mike is visiting friends in Miami), I'm starting to crack. Human contact has been minimal and holds on jobs (a rarity for this time of year) have been released. My apologies to all that have witnessed my emotional vomit today.

Needless to say I need to speak up for myself more often to avoid getting myself into such psychological pickles. However, when I do enter such a state of mind, my writing becomes very flower-y. Hence the cheeseball metaphors.

Just trying to meet my quota for the day and unfortunately doing the same emotional vomit thing to you, dear readers, as I have to a few friends.

Anyway, there are people with bigger problems, real problems (mine are more or less a result of overanalysis and lack of communication with particular individuals). Natasha Leyonne being one of those people (I'm watching Slums of Beverly Hills).

I'm going to go make pastina now. It's good for the soul.

P.S. For the record, not a tear has dropped over my current internal conundrum. I just wanted to let that be known.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

About Lawyers

I'm posting this because it fills my personal goal of a one post quota per day. That, and I know Conor gets this on his RSS feed, although I'm pretty sure he's either read it or received it via email.

On that note, I have many dear friends who are at different levels of lawyerdom. I've watched one drink the night before the bar and pass (because, to be modest, he's a fucking genius), suffer at work and manipulate the system to his benefit (again, the man is a genius). Then there's another friend in law school and another who is a paralegal, who, although she loves her job (the only person I know who does), she is considering a career change to education. To all of you, please enjoy this tidbit from the mighty Gawker:

Lawyers Reconsidering What They Signed Up For

There are a few kinds of people who go to law school. Some go because they dream of being district attorneys, bringing bad guys to justice and making $45,000 a year for the privilege. Some go because they dream of being big-shot defense attorneys, hogging time on television while they profess their Mafia clients' innocence. Some go because they have nothing better to do. But most law students, let's face it, are simply in it for the money. They want that blue-chip firm salary right off the bat (currently hovering around $145,000 plus bonus for a first-year associate) and the potential huge riches that come with one day being named partner (somewhere in the $1 million range, minimum, per year).

But here's a news flash: Turns out you actually have to, you know, work for that kind of money--which is making young lawyers bail in droves:

They are unhappy with their Blackberry lifestyle - being tethered to the job 24/7 and having to rush back to the office at a moment's notice when e-mail orders pop up on the ubiquitous PDA.
The exodus of law firm associates is unprecedented, according to the National Association of Law Placement, or NALP, which found that 37 percent of associates leave large firms within the first three years.

A whopping 77 percent of associates leave within five years, according to NALP's latest survey. The author of the piece is a former lawyer who left the profession to write a novel. As if we need more of those.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Chavs and Bogans

I've been trying to watch this movie Morvern Callar that Ivy lent me straight out of her husband's shopping bag. I think it's pretty great but I'm suffering from an attack of ADD (shit is contagious). Anyway, it's from the UK and arty and a bit of a drag. I just wish I could give it the attention it deserves. But this is all besides the point. There is something about it that I can't put in words at the moment that made me think of chavs.

For those of you who don't know what a chav is, it's the height of style in the UK. I want to say that as loosely as possible. Being a fan of garage/two-step (potato/patoto) and grime for several years (thanks to the time put in at many drum n bass parties in my late teens), I'm familiar with the actual steez - bling (of the gold, not diamond variety), track suits, fake designer shit. Very Ali G for those of you not familiar with the scene. Fake thug. But a chav itself is kinda scummy. From what I read, Brits compare them to rednecks or trailer trash.

And I totally get the fashion association! Now please, my more in the know NYers, I no longer live on the corner of hip and before the times. Anyone remember Von Dutch? Six years (give or take) it became cool in hip circles to dress white trash. Oh the irony. Then 2-3 years later, everyone was all about the trucker hats and vintage T's and whatever else trickled down from the streets to the masses. It's the same exact thing! Only British!

Anyway, I immediately emailed Sarah because during my research I came upon a beautiful nugget of colloquialisms! Here's my email:

between lady fucking sovereign (love her, don't hate her) and lily
allen, all i hear about is chav this and chav that and chav style.
lagerfeld wants to make lily allen his new bitch because the way she
flips chanel chav style. in my attempts to put a finger on exactly
what chav style is, i turned to google. after overly eloquent
britishisms about the class divide and different slang for chav based
on region ("ned" and "kev" for example), i came across this on some
bulletin board:

"Sorry, Spider, you are mistaken.
Chavs are NOT what you are thinking of.
You are thinking of prep.
Chavs are what Americans call trailer trash, or rednecks.
There is also a group in Australia which has a similar stigma, the bogan."

You see, bogan is one of the most used words in Sarah's vocab (she's very Aussie btw, in an American way, if you feel me). My cousin Matt went to college with Sars and when I first told him I work with her, bogan was the first thing he said.

Sidenote: For those of you who don't know who Sov is, it's not Patty Deegan who works at Sovereign Bank, although that could be a great nickname for her. I can't deal with internal links right now, just go to ladysovereign.com.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Like the Plague

That's how I've been avoiding this. And I really don't know why.

Hope everyone had a great holiday and happy 007, y'all.

I've spent countless hours from Thanksgiving to New Year's in cars, steaming shitty clothes made for overweight men sold in catalogs, returning things I never actually bought, making BFF's everywhere I go, drinking too much champagne and trying no to complain about work, alcoholism in certain individuals and the overall lack of gossip to read on the internet.

I could kill myself lurking around myspace (I hate it, I hate what it stands for, I hate that I even do it) so I forced myself to do this. Because I have to. I made a commitment to it. I hope 007 brings lots of things to write about because I'm bored with this already.