Aversion to Failure (Happy New Year!)

I've spent too many hours in cars driving form here to there, getting lost from there to there and making 5 more trips before getting back home. Holidays were lovely - surprised the hell out of my folks with a new TV (their reaction: "Are you high?"), hung out a lot with my HS BFF Abbey. But that's besides my point here.

Last year, my resolution was stop bitching about Boston. I had a terrible attitude toward my adopted city and I realized that I needed to change that around if I were to ever enjoy life here. Mission accomplished. But what about this year?

I have an aversion to failure. It's my biggest fear. I don't do a lot of things because I'm so petrified of failing. Is it because I'm a perfectionist? Or a Virgo? I mean, I'm one of the laziest people I know, but I always squash opportunities I can create for myself in the earliest stages simply because I think there's a chance (be it big or small) or failure. I don't want to waste time, money or embarrassment (I embarrass myself enough elsewhere in life). And all I ever say is that I need something to excite me to keep me productive. So really, what's the hold up?

Realizing that most success is the offspring of failure, I need to try. I need to stop holding off on things simply because I don't want that particular project to result as a failure. So my resolution is to stop getting in the way of myself, or allowing anyone else's opinions about whatever get in the way of what I want to do. That includes work, taking tap dancing lessons, how I dress and starting a jazz band with Shaka.

Only time will tell. Also, I got a new pretty red camera so expect lots more personal pics. Excitement all around.